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I missed out on a father to whom I could turn, unburden my problems, and trust to be led by example - with armfuls of comfort and the right advice, merrily to carry me over the times when spirit is low. I know how such backing would certainly serve as a tower of strength for the length of my current crisis - surmising also there'll be many others, when I'd hope to grope for personal solutions, with you beside me. You've tried instead to sledgehammer and disparage my fragile self-esteem with an ever ready spread of belittling comment, as the meanest critic an admittedly vulnerable performer bore as a millstone.      It saddens me that other people had      a far more kindly and supportive Dad.